Terrorism gayab !

Well, the reason the blogging has been light lately is that I am seriously thinking about the way to rid India of terrorism (and the minor matter of null pointers*)
Atlast I have stumbled upon the solution. But first, what exactly is the problem? Let me say, unequivocally! Violence doesn’t arise out of thin air, it has root causes.
And I have identified the root cause and it is fiendishly straight forward.

Think, from Ghatkopar to Mumbai local, who were the targets? Why, it was Gujaratis, and mind you not any Gujaratis, it was upper caste Gujaratis , the trading class.

There we have the problem, people of Gujarat represent the anti-thesis of the aims and goals that the secularists have cherished and for which our “socialist secular” republic was founded. Gujaratis are entrepreneur, preferring to slog it out than depend on doles handed out by welfare state, poorest of Gujarat has this never say die attitude which means no groveling masses before our two penny Caesars. This in itself is a slap in the face of our Fabians.
However the blasphemy doesn’t stop here. They are religious, which is not a bad thing in itself, but it is the wrong religion for Nehru’s sake. And when I say religious, it is not “I am more of spiritual than religious” or “All believe in all religions” or some weasel maneuver like that, it is “Jai Shri Krishna” waala religion. Imagine the pain and strenuous effort of our eminent secularists to rid India of the blight of that superstitious, morally repugnant and evil religion called Hinduism.
All this for naught! Because of undermining by Gujaratis, Marx! Marx! This menace has to be stopped right here.

The solution is not extremely complicated.

The first part is establishing the role communal Gujaratis have in all the communal violence.
Second part, from first holding the bigoted Gujaratis for all the terrorist attacks by the misguided and oppressed member of a religion, which must not be named but which is the best thing after chawal-rajma. Cause and Effect, Action and Reaction. Considering the dhimmitude of Indian subject ofcourse the question will not be reversed.

Third part why stop at second step, sure Gujaratis couldn’t have become so intolerant all of sudden, they must have been such prior to that, and simple induction will prove that they were communalists even when they were nothing more than chemical cocktail. Hence blame for any communal violence, at any time in India should be pinned on Gujaratis with retrospective effect. Further Narendra Modi is to be termed as reincarnation of Hitler, Ivan The Terrible and Vlad The Impaler.

After it has been done Gujaratis should be sent to reeducation camp and made thoroughly secular by Das Kapital. Any residual Hinduism is to be treated with Atlas Shrugged**.
Sure terrorism may or may not disappear with this, but this will keep unwashed Indians busy and help secularists in instilling “rationalist” and “secular” ideas.


* When you use pointers, check for null pointers.
** I have an irrational dislike for Ayn Rand, frankly speaking it is only irrationality which makes my life pleasant.