My contribution to civilization

Yes, yes everyone and his nephew knows that marriages boost economy, so does act of fornication or little toddlers shitting in diapers or teenagers getting pimples, but please! how can anyone talk of trifles like economics when world is faced with such a threatening situation? Unless you have been living under a stone or are a vile free market fundamentalist, by now you must have realized the dire consequences of global warming.
And yet what is being done, nothing my dear fellows ! Even as retired politicians and born again Hollywood actors are heroically trying to save the planet by hopping continents on private jets, we are ignoring the biggest culprit, flatulence ! Yes, friends, farts (human and bovine) contribute one tenth* towards green house gas emission, and hence are to be blamed for polar bears forgetting swimming (and getting stranded on breaking Antarctic ice sheets). Desperate situation calls for desperate measures, and therefore I propose that a "fart tax" be levied and the revenue thus generated be used to subsidize research on Eco-friendly gastronomical innovations . The tax will be both on individuals as well as Hindu joint family, family gatherings being a major source of global warming. It is only by these "out of the box" solutions that we can counter this menace and make planet a better place for children (human and ursine)